I remember the first few months into my separation – I was angry, depressed, and vengeful. Those feelings were magnified when I discovered ex had moved in with his gf and I had not even filed for divorce yet. All I wanted to do was stay in bed and pull the covers over my head, hoping it would all be over soon. I was weary from the years of putting up with ex’s lies and infidelity. I was depressed due to lack of finances and deteriorating friendships, I was mentally and physically exhausted from trying to maintain a home, a job and schoolwork. It took a lot of self-discipline to get up each morning and keep on keeping on.
Sometimes it is good to stay in bed, to pull the covers over one’s head and go back to sleep. We all need that time of rest and relaxation. Sometimes that extra time to relax and just do nothing is better medication than any antidepressant. If we allow ourselves to get exhausted and run down we run the risk of getting sick. That can snowball into a million other things – time off work, lost wages, loss of time with family, etc.
So, stay in bed every now and again. Close your eyes and go back to sleep. A word of caution – don’t dwell in the place of depression. If you find yourself wanting more and more not to get out of bed, it may be time to see your doc about antidepressants. There is a balance here. You are responsible for yourself now – that includes taking care of your physical and mental health. Do not be so hard on yourself that you do not allow yourself to relax, sleep in, or just do nothing. A little extra sleep may be what you need to find your happiness again. Look at that lovely lady in the mirror and tell her she’s beautiful, then give yourself a big hug!. Stay tuned . . . .
Starting Over After a Midlife Divorce 